Updated: Jul 23
You are everywhere you go. You impact every interaction you have – personally, professionally, socially. You are the common denominator, and that’s a good thing since you are all you have control over.
Your life experience, attachment style, and personality influence each interaction you have. There are personality types you find more difficult than others, situations that push your buttons.
Look for patterns. Patterns do not indicate blame. They provide the necessary information to break them.
Since we are called to, “If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Rom. 12:18), this work is critical. Recognizing relational patterns is key to managing your triggers, developing coping skills, and learning to extend grace to yourself and others.
It isn’t easy to spot our own patterns. We are too close. We lack objectivity. We also tend to look at people and situations superficially. Choose a trusted friend or coach to help you look deeper into yourself and your actions/reactions.
Patterns rarely appear until we look at the roots. Unlike plants, if the root is the same, the flower will be the same; relational issues with the same origin can result in blossoms that appear to be very different.
Your friends only call you when they need something, and you are the